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another lost entry...bastards
2002-10-28 ~ 2:16 a.m.
okay...fuck that... yet another really long entry wiped out... *shaking head in disbelief* i am so not retyping all of that. i will try to summarize... something unbelieably funny for you... last night...at oh, so 4 ish in the morning i had to call the snake to try to get the mouse's number because the comrade had left her cell phone... i was a failure at the mission. tonight, as we were walking out to the garage we stopped at the counter... seems the mouse did not run in to the kitchen for candy after all. sneaky little mouse. which makes me something of a dumbass. mmmhmmm...anyway... hey to bessie...you cracked my ass up at the bar. comrade...it is a harcore game and we need a play book. blah...blah...blah... something about a girl and another girl...and one girl leaning forward to whisper something and getting pulled in...and there was a mouth on the graceful curve of a neck and moans escaping from waiting lips...legs ready to wrap, around...or something like that then something else...which i don't recall... and then i was talking about how when i dropped my robe after my shower this evening, i actually almost saw myself...i think. and i am ashamed of the scars...and in my perpetual duality, glad they are there...they remind me. and most of the time they are healing...but i don't know what they might look like to someone else...how you even try to explain that. and i turned...in the mirror to grab clothes and saw the lines of my hips and thought...for a fraction of a second...that maybe i wasn't overweight. maybe...one day. tonight was a good relaxed kind of night. a beer, a shot, a shot, a beer, a beer, a shot, a beer...and some food. they opened with "i don't wanna talk about it"...it was suiting to my mood tonight. and now my *naughty* song is on... and i wonder if perhaps i dreamed that little incident at the bar... i think i must have...? ..."and your head is bent back...and your back is arched..." did you hear about gizmo eating my halo? yeah...along with the rest of the house. hahaha i am thinking that living between her hips would be a nice place indeed. so...apparently, i come here often...and you? looks like i might be having to make a trip to sue's wednesday night without a comrade...*sigh* there is a game underway, in case you hadn't noticed, and when the question is asked...and it will be..."where is your comrade?" i will smile and say..."there was some psycho chick at the bar who scared her off throwing bottle caps at her" and i will shrug. muhahaha...uncle kracker is on... i am a little distressed over something...and it needs to be clarified. comrade insinuated that i might very well get 'slimed'...and i am afraid that is not going to happen. i have boundaries, in addition to standards. are you with me? yeah, there is one who could pose danger to my impending doom...but i have confessed as much. and there is no slime involved. did you notice that the mouse has pergo floors...that makes me jealous. you know...this whole age difference thing. not only do i respect the various opinions, i agree. (duality again) it can be relative to life experience and emotional maturity...but that is not the issue at hand. i still agree with the general ten year principle...but that makes me one lucky woman. *grin* so...what are you up to? why don't you sign the freaking guest book and tell me?? of course, if you are still reading this...well, yeah. i have a lot to do today...errands to run and such. there is possibility the phone might ring? shit...there is a possibility someone else's phone might ring. *hiding fangs* i do, in fact, want the sex goddess bella and hot sexy bartender/singer chick to sing "trouble in shangri-la"...and i was delighted with "free falling"... i can not seem to keep my mind in line tonight...it keeps wandering off... feathers and leather and lace and chain metal...why was that ever said?? i need to call my therapist. i need to pay closer attention... i am going to go sit outside and smoke, have a nice night.
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