horoscope hilarity
2002-10-30 ~ 4:38 a.m.

all medded up, like a good girl, woozy...

but not sleepy. ate some soup, actually used a bowl this time.

and i kid mouse about not cooking. ah, but i do cook...when there is something i really want or someone else to cook for.

i need motivation to go to bed...now even sleep is avoiding me.

so...bored, i decided to check my horoscope...i am a cancer...

and this is what it said...

horoscope # 1 - "Your quick mind and sharp eyes are seriously impressive. The joke's so obvious, but only a few people are laughing. Now you know who your friends are. This also gives you an idea of who'd be good on a date."

so, finding this one really funny...i kept going...(there are a lot of horoscopes to be had for any given day, week or month...and a million websites)

so...*cheers to my 'supposed' future and present...*

horsocope #2 - "How many times have you had this argument? From the looks of things, going another round probably won't clear the air. You know you are right when it comes to a certain discussion you are having with a suitor or a potential love interest, but it still may take a while for them to figure out just how deep your wisdom runs. Give them time and they'll come running to you once again. You need to be both kind and patient."

horoscope #3 - "Some of the weekend's glory still clings to you on Monday. Life returns to normal for a few days, but that's okay. Count your friends and your remaining funds. Even when you're not up there on the peaks, the valleys don't seem as low as they once were. Any lingering doubts are gone by Thursday. Put your real self on display, or maybe the ideal version that's usually visible only to intimate friends. When you convince yourself, what you see might as well be real. Self-delusion works beautifully through Friday, but you're in trouble if you try to play this game on Saturday or Sunday. Innocent lies turn easily into vicious rumors. You could get stuck in a role you don't like. The least you can do is be ready for it."

horsocope #4 - "Go deeper than first impressions. Once you've profiled your likely lovers, get to know them and find out whether you were right. You're dating everyone and committing to no one. You're not being fickle. You just happen to have a plan."

*at this point, i am laughing so hard i am crying*

horoscope #5 - "Strangers forget to be shy and stare at each other in open fascination. Casual acquaintances see an attractive spark they never noticed before. Now that you have this person's attention, let the magic happen however it will"

horoscope #6 - "You're dancing center stage early this week, Crab -- so make sure you know all of the steps! Now is your chance to really shine, and to let all those important folks know that you can handle the pressure. But remember -- there's a difference between showing your stuff and showing off. Thursday and Friday are great days for communicating, so you and your honey should meet at a quiet cafe and take turns speaking your piece -- clearing the air in advance will allow you two to enjoy your weekend without any unspoken craziness."

*finally...while rolling on the floor*

horoscope #7 - "You emerge from this volatile period as a truly wealthy person. By the end of August, add your good judgment and acquired skills to this already potent mix. From your privileged position, you can see the writing on the wall when Jupiter opposes Neptune on September 11th. Know when and where to draw the line. The carnival is over by the 22nd. The Libra Sun makes you unsure of yourself and dependent on others. You're ready to drop out of the race, but others won't let you forget that you're losing. It's hard to blame them for feeling good after your long sojourn at the top. Your sense of adventure returns in late October and early November as Neptune and Uranus go direct, improving your mood if not your circumstances. You're ready to make things happen again. By Thanksgiving, though, it's obviously an uphill battle. Let idealism sustain you for the rest of the year. Reality may catch up with you in late December, but if not, your dream will come true eventually."

wow...*lighting a smoke*

who knew?

bahahaha....that was lots of fun for me!

i have got to find sleep...the naughty song is on...

....bed, right.

can i sleep right there? between your hips?

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