white washed in moonshine
2002-11-19 ~ 11:33 p.m.

tonight was a relaxed night, a good night to have a smoke and eat too much and watch a little lord of the rings with a jo...or have a few drinks and put together a desk, a few screws short...

ahh...so i have a gleam in my eye and the lunatics are running the asylum so i am in good hands...

and those are good hands, they really are.

what was that abgout ratchet sets? and how bad are we that we can turn that in to something naughty?

i read the news today...an oil spill twice the size of valdez...death, fires, wrecks, gunfire...

such cruelty, such desparity, such obscenity...

i recoil from it as though my fingers had been tipped in soldering metal...

scents, sense...

takes me back and rushes me forward years.

eternity...

walks out on to moon whitened concrete, the girl looks up to the sky.

moon hangs high tonight, she whispers to no one. it shines brightly...

harsh glare of a remaining street light shines briefly before the bulb sputters to darkness...

the girl drops her head, falls to one knee...

one tear forms and solidifies then shatters like crystal as it splashes down...

the dreams came back today, after the conversation last night...

woke up confused and overshadowed.

the search for beauty must begin and prevail, it must be a success.

so much depends on each of us...paths entertwined and tangled...

i am honored to know those people who will be at my side during the finality of it all...

and yet, these days...beneath the roar of war and the despair of dust and blood...*listen*

there is a smooth undercurrent...

"oh...i've seen a part of people that i never knew was there..."

could it be that we will be granted another chance?

lst night i was reminded of things...of guardians and swords, of truth and light...and love.

she asked me what i saw...and i told her pieces...but

nothing of the bodies of the smallest of us all...those most innocent of our crimes...stacked on top of one another.

nothing of my walk through the blinding darkness of a moon washed landscape, barren of all but the heartiest of shrubbery...even it stunted. leading them by the hundreds to a place where the air and water are not poison and history is not doomed to the likes of instructions on a shampoo bottle...

rinse and repeat, indeed.

but who am i to dream such things? to be caught up in such magical thinking?

to know what is happening, to watch it unfold...to be powerless until the time has come.

"memories seep from my veins..."

and if i asked of you to drink...would you?

i plead with you...

find something beautiful and keep it tight to your chest...be thankful.

look to the sky in awe once more...

delight in the laughter of a child...

find your happiness...

release the fear, embrace the light.

"this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees...

may you find some comfort here..."

and know that in all things, we must endure.

*pouring a drink*

there is a moment when your eyes are a kaleidoscope and i am swirled away...

and there is much to be done.

*lighting candles...*

every day we form another piece to the puzzle of history...what have you added today?

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