holding sand
2005-05-15 ~ 11:22 p.m.

thank you for the phone call. that was my highlight.

softball was mildly entertaining and uneventful.

thoughts today are difficult ones. was thinking about the facts. not perceptions or anything speculative, just the facts... of several things.

half empty - half full - there is no glass - more importantly, while there may be a glass - there is no water

fact is. there is lots of water (just not for drinking)

fact is.

fact is...

inherently more fucked than fiction.

there is a lot of stuff that goes through my head. very little of it is fact.

but i know what the words don't say. what my own mouth would never say.

i know all my little facts that i continue closing the door on. it squishes the breakable things in me.

fact is...what i don't say is probably always more important than what i do say. but i think that to only me, so i keep it to only me.

tell me...please tell me that the sky is not falling. it always seem to be so much more than just rain.

how do you hold a handful of sand?

i think you can just add water though blood would work better.

i'm going to re-adjust my pillows and try another night of laying long in the dark.

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