off to bathe...
2002-11-26 ~ 2:45 a.m.

FUCK!

can i just take a sec to breathe in and out and not think about my resume for a second? i couldn't even make it past stream...

gods...

how is it that find myself here, having to rewrite a three year old resume after doing all of what i just wrote about? damn.

trey, shane, matt ... you are references. i expect something glowing. something a bit nicer than 'the bitch on mentor row' anyway...

hahaha

so, i shall have company very early in the morning. a mouse is delivering a dog. yes, funny...isn't it?

so i shall puppy sit the day away and clean the house...because that is what must be done.

all random rogues, vagrants and lesbians are invited to the house on turkey day...

there shall be food (from whence we do not know...), football, beer and friends...and strangers probably.

it should be entertaining and fun.

the best and dearest friend of a mouse is coming to visit...to hear mouse talk about her...it reminds me of jenna.

jenna...you are expected if not at home, tammy is welcome as well.

mel, if you can, join us...i am sure you will need to eat by then.

matt and jenny...if you are still out there and get bored and frightened of families...come see us!

bailey...baby it will good to see you!!!

so...the church is supposed to happen for one group and the other is going to sue's later that night...take your pick, i am thinking...really.

and honestly, we should go to sue's and watch linda on her box in my opinion. comrade says she has the second best ass in the bar...and my, what she can do with mesh!!

which takes me back to the other night and my lewd actions...and i hate having to apologize for drunk, stupid, entranced by music and bubbles carla.

ahhh, so be it.

and that naturally led to naughty thought progression, probably because i just inundated myself and shane with enough tests and quizzes to do us both in...

as i was saying...

nevermind, i forgot.

i have therapy wednesday at 11...i cannot forget this. i must remember this. unless i get a job interview for then. obviously.

one problem about the job...i am only cleared by "the big company" for 32 hours...which is legally full time but might not make a new employer happy...? and there is nothing i can do about it for at least a month or so of being back in the saddle...

restrictions and roadblocks and hazard signs

and why am i choking

feel like something erupted convulsing in my brain just then...oh dear.

tonight at the local fast food place i had a moment...

of sheer fucking panic.

he was there. right in the mirror...leering. just the fastest little glimmer...seeing things out of the corners of my eyes again is probably not a good thing....

but he was there and i saw him...and my foot almost lost the brake which would have resulted in the following:

i, panic, lose the brake..alternately finding the gas and then slam in to the tahoe in front of me...

the one with the hockey mom sticker on it...the one with the cool, efficient hockey mom ordering for an entire team of little hockey players...all wanting their order a certain way and knowing with the knowledge that comes with priveledge that they will get it.

and suddenly, the local headlines read..'crazed lesbian runs down hockey team and career mom just as they get their piece of the american hamburger'...

one toothless bad grammar having eyewitness says: "it was as though she did not see them, at first. but when she backed up and ran them over...again and again. we all kinda figgered she was pissed about the wait or something..."

...which naturally leads to the court case being dismissed...

because all of that, my dear readers, was in fact caused by a delay due to the local fast food joint being understaffed when a tahoe full of hockey-playing eliticists who will grow up to be republicans ordered a dozen burgers each made a different way.

which decidedly removes the blame from me and i can fall away from the tabloid headlines...

and go back to the flourescent cube of my dreams...

where i can sit with my feet on the desk...barefoot even...smoking a joint and drinking rum and coke...and being called rumbuns by "the client"...while making sure our profit margin is at an all time high.

or i could think about your mouth...

i like the way it feels...

i wonder what comes over me at times when i am near you...hugging you from behind...then suddenly kising you, back pressed to the door...head held in my hands...

interesting. and i might think twice about it...but i am fairly sure i quite fancy it.

tonight i want to cuddle. cold always does that to me. good thing i have big furry puppies.

did i mention that i saw my old neighbor at the bar? yeah...weird. cool though. it was good to see her.

also...i am quite taken with the 'tongue joy' which can be found at steelnavel.com...yet am pissy because it looks like i will be resizing down to a 14 due to lack of entertaining jewellry? *grin*

that thing is hilarious really...go look.

i ordered a doorknocker...and i need my retainer or a new one...and mel, can you help me with that? *smile*

i am all over the place and am off to take a bath...

stay warm.

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