a long damn time
2004-05-11 ~ 7:28 p.m.

that was a very fucking cool conversation. you see, i decided...following hester's lovely example...to look up a teacher i had in high school. so we emailed and then talked on the phone. was nice to hear how life has been, to hear that she is still teaching (different subject) and loves it.

it should not be shocking that i would vote for ralph nader, people. i talk to trees...it is true. most importantly, he has struck a chord with me that decries the outsourcing of jobs. echoing ross perot's sentiments when it came to nafta. and maybe i am more sensitive about the issue simply because i did have the unique and wonderful oppurtunity to go to another country and train them to take our jobs. perhaps because i was a communications worker and we got no benefit extensions under nafta...not even retraining. mmhmmm

sorry about that...anyway, the conversation was nice. she always struck me as being "good people" and i always watch for them.

life is good on a tuesday. might have lunch with a mouse soon. therapy for the first time in a year. game night this friday.

emer is out of town for the week. just me and hester. i wonder where hester is...?

i should go do something...it never ceases to amaze me how i never get anything done.

i found this way back...

i am different than that/don't do things that way/can't feel that way/can't take those things/shelves are crowded/nowhere to put them/stop saying that/you don't mean it/wish you did/didn't bleed to see the blood/didn't hurt to make it real/didn't drown to vanish/make it all numb/can't sit here like this/shrouded by silence/pale yellow silence/creaking/nothing left of last night/last month/last year/that other life/save distraction/crave it like nicotine and that other/seek it out tonight/i'll be organizing/corporate re-org/makes me cringe/do it anyway

fuck you man, where do you get off? i want to avoid that stop. if you really knew as much as your diplomas and dilemnas claim then you would understand distraction keeps me breathing. it all makes me want to laugh/cry/suck it up and die

...

i really like that. i am taking that in with me on thursday.

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